Resumes

I think some day I should teach a class on what to NOT put on a resume.  Sure, there are lots of things you SHOULD put on a resume, but there are definitely things you should not.  Over the past 12 years at the office, we have seen a lot of resumes.  Hundreds.   Mostly horrible.  Mostly people I would not ever call back.  Tonight I posted a job on craigslist for our front desk at the office.  Within 10 minutes I had 5 resumes.  All bad.

First, I watch for spelling.  In this day and age of spell check, how can anybody send things with spelling errors?  Sure, there is always a tricky one that spell check doesn't get because it may be spelled right, just a homophone used in the wrong context or something.  But really...that's not what I'm talking about.

Second, I check for attention to detail--overall look, spaces, extra commas, consistency in verb tenses, etc.

Third, I look at their job history.  Really, some people will send a resume where they have had 8 jobs in the past 2 years.  Why would I look twice at that person?  Those go straight to the trash.

Fourth, I look for statements that let me know that they are not interested in a long-term position.  Like someone who is going to school pursuing a criminal justice degree and graduating next year.  That's all fine, but not someone I want to hire and train in a medical office if they will be leaving next summer after they graduate.

Fifth, I look at where they live.  If they live within 20 minutes I figure that is somebody who could be a long-term employee.

Anyway, here are a few good spelling errors from the first resume I saw today: Qualifacations, avalible, responcabilitys (spelled twice this way...not a good sign), and she earned her GED from a local community "Colege."  Great.  Another girl looked quite promising from her cover letter, but her resume referred to "ruber dams" and that she is "CPR certifided."

The second resume didn't have spelling errors, but she definitely lacked attention to detail.  Her cover letter stated, "I am responding to the employment opportunity listed on your Web site. Please accept this letter and my attached resume as evidence of my interest, in applying for the legal receptionist position at your law firm with the starting wage of 11 dollars an hour."  She sent me the cover letter she had written for another job listing--we are not a legal office, did not post the job on our web site, and I did not mention any starting wage in my ad.  Perhaps this would have just been funny, but it was actually quite ironic because her next sentence says, "I am very detail oriented."  Sure, honey.

The third resume wasn't much, but everything was spelled correctly.  It is someone who admits she has no experience in the medical field, but is willing to learn and she has worked as an appointment setter at her current job for 7 years.  I just might give her a call.

A busy week

I abandoned my husband and kids last weekend for a trip to Utah.  I spent last Wednesday with my mom, and met up with some old friends for dinner.  Then Thursday I went to the annual Bradley Girls Party in St. George.  I spent the weekend knitting, baking, laughing and having a great time with my favorite ladies in the world.  Then Sunday night I spent with my family celebrating my dad's 65th birthday.  It was very fun, because a couple of years ago we never thought he would have a 65th birthday.

Then I came home and played catch-up for all the things I had slacked on.  Laundry and cleaning were first.  And then it was time to sew.  Last month I offered to sew a dress for someone in our ward who will be sealed in the temple tomorrow.  I got distracted sewing all the Halloween costumes, and didn't get a chance to really sew her dress until this week.   I finished it up last night, and luckily all the kids were home from school today so our house could get a deep cleaning.  I told the kids we could go to PicoBerry when the house was clean, and they all pitched in and did whatever I said.  We're all shiny now and ready for a big party at our house tomorrow night.

I got a few projects done today that have been waiting for a while.  I have long had framed portraits of Abraham Lincoln and George Washington hanging in a hallway.  About a year ago I bought portraits of 6 more founding fathers to hang in the basement.  I framed them all, and then they sat there because I dreaded the project of getting 6 things to  hang all perfectly in a row.  But today I did it, and it looks awesome.
When I was in Utah with my mom, I took my first trip to Pier 1 Imports.  I never had been there before, although there is one only 4 miles from my house.   I found so many treasures!   I found this cute owl for my kitchen wall.

And I found this set of 3 owl prints for the wall above my piano.  It's exactly what I needed.

We have lived in our house for almost 10 years and the walls are all painted beautiful colors, but I have never hung anything up.  I was waiting to find just the right things, and Zachary hated shopping so I didn't get too much of a chance to go out looking for just the right things before he was in school.  Maybe I will get crazy and make some curtains or throw pillows here soon.

Colonoscopy!

Has it been 3 years already?  Yes, it has.  Three years ago a colonoscopy saved my life.  A pre-cancerous polyp was found and removed.  My doctor ordered me to come back in five years and to instruct my siblings to have colonoscopies as well.  This was not only because of what they found in me at my age, but also because of the fact that my father had colon cancer at a relatively young age.

And all of my siblings went in for their colonoscopies.  4 siblings, 3 of them also had polyps.  So my doctor saved their lives as well by encouraging them to get checked.

So do the math.  Dad with colon cancer+80% of his children with colon polyps in their '30s.

My doctor then decided that I should come back every 3 years.  And it's that time again!  Next month I go back for part 2.  Not that I am excited to have a colonoscopy again, but I am glad to know that the technology is there to keep an eye on things (that's a horrible way to phrase that, but oh well).

This past year my next door neighbor was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer at age 46.  2 little kids, healthiest, fittest guy I know.  He has done everything right, had absolutely no risk factors, and yet he has colon cancer.  His case was almost identical to my dad's, including its location in the liver as well.  I told him at the beginning he was going to beat it, because my dad had battled nearly the same thing and come out on top.  He is fighting like a champ, and everything is looking like he will be a survivor.

Just like my adorable dad.  We are so lucky to have him still around to tell the kids excellent bedtime stories and take them to the air force base.  The kids love to hear his stories about everything, and they really love to see his scars from his cancer surgeries and hear the stories about where they came from.

Why did I write this post?  Just to encourage everyone reading it to go have a colonoscopy.  It's really not a big deal.  Sure, it's not that fun, but it's not scary at all.  The only thing scary is NOT having one done.

Halloween

I finished up all of our costumes without a minute to spare.  We first went to the dental office for the traditional pictures by the fish fountain and trick-or-treating along main street.

Abram wanted to be Abraham Lincoln.   Before he was born, we were worried about naming him Abraham because I was worried he would get teased and called "Abe Lincoln."  Abram was a shorter and easier name, and we liked it, so we went with Abram instead of Abraham.  And then one day in kindergarten Abram told me that he wished we had named him Abraham like Abraham Lincoln.

And then as a senior in high school he decided to grow an Abe Lincoln beard and dress up like him for Halloween.  I had purchased this pattern years ago hoping that somebody would want to be Abe Lincoln one day.

 Noah wanted to be Pikachu.  Our boys have had a Pokemon renewal lately.  When Jacob was 5 I made him an Ash costume.  And now that he is 15 he wanted to be Ash again.  There was no pattern for a big Ash, so I just used a shirt pattern and made the sleeves and collar white and ran bias tape around the edges.

 Joel was Buddy the Elf.  Everyone loved this costume, and the collar is so fluffy.

 Gingerbread Zachary.

 And Mary Poppins Savanna.  Practically Perfect in every way.

 Pikachu Noah.  Some people thought he was a banana....or a bumble bee.  Guess they weren't up on their Pokemon classics.

In our family, we have a weird tradition.  The kids get back from trick-or-treating and they all dump their candy in an enormous bowl.  And everyone shares the candy.  It's crazy, I know.  It's a far cry from the way I was as a kid where we hid or candy bag in the closet where nobody could find it.

I have no idea how or why we started doing it this way, but somehow when the kids were little I did it one time, and it stuck.  They are all sitting right now at the kitchen bar sorting through the big bowl of everyone's candy.  After they go to bed I go through and throw away all of the sick candy that nobody is going to eat--and the jawbreakers that their daddy doesn't want anyone one earth to eat.

The other rule we have is that they have to eat a lot of candy all at once--and then brush their teeth.  It's the candy-all-day-long that causes cavities, not the amount of candy.  And then after 2 weeks we throw away whatever is left. 

I don't know that I have ever made 6 costumes in one year.  It's a new record.

Crafty Sunday

The kids spent the entire day cutting paper and coloring all kinds of things. Our house was a disaster.

I made these cute gingerbread mummies this afternoon while I pretended I could not see the happy and creative mess the kids had made all over the kitchen table.  

And then tonight at bedtime Abram needed a quick project made for AP lit tomorrow. For extra credit he could carve or decorate a pumpkin or other fall vegetable to resemble any major character from literature.  When he asked me which character he should pick last week I thought Captain Ahab would be the easiest choice. I didn't know it was due tomorrow....

You may remember that I won a first place ribbon in 3rd grade for my vegetable art project. At my elementary school it was a big deal and almost everyone created something fantastic from all sorts of vegetables.

So tonight I came up with this great vegetable art project for Abram: 2 potatoes attached with a chopstick and another chopstick for the peg leg, forks for arms and a clove for the eye. A ponytail elastic and some black paper made a perfect eye patch.  A little black yarn and some hot glue were the finishing touch to make Ahab's hairy head and chin.

Hopefully Abram's teacher likes it as much as he does.  What we won't do for 25 points of extra credit.

A big scam

Some people think the Better Business Bureau is a regulatory agency with some sort of power to force businesses to let consumers push them around. It is nothing of the sort. It is a club. The more you pay them, the more they will promote your business and recommend you to people who call to inquire.  It's like a chamber of commerce--on steroids.

Over the last 12 years, a few people have threatened to "report" us to the Better Business Bureau (these are people who have dental work done and then feel like they should not have to pay for it even though they signed a form saying they were financially responsible), and we tell them to go ahead.  The BBB is all a big racket.    I never knew exactly how big of a racket it was.  Until yesterday.

Anyway, a woman called me yesterday from the BBB.   She was telling me about how our business was eligible to be accredited by the BBB because of our blemish-free business history with them.  I asked her if this was a sales call and she assured me it was not--simply that our business record was brought to their attention as a business that deserved their utmost seal of approval and she just needed some information.  She started asking me a bunch of questions about Mark, the office, how long we have been in business, etc. Pretty harmless, right?

After about 15 minutes of this I finally asked her flat out how much money this was going to cost me.  She started on a spiel about how the BBB is a not-for-profit organization funded entirely by the dues of its members.  I asked again, "How much?"  "Well, our fees are based on the number of full-time employees a business has, and so in your case that annual dues would only be $975."

I laughed.  I laughed hard.  Really, how insane is that?  Pay a meaningless organization $975 per year so that I can use their logo on my website?  Do you know how many google clicks I can buy with $975?

And then I was mad.  She had promised me up front that it was not a sales call--and it was.  And then she tried selling me on all the benefits our company would reap if we would only join....which was a whole lot of nothing.  I told her she had better move on to her next sales lead, because not a chance I was biting.

So perhaps this was a meaningless post to you.  But just in case somebody out there thought that the BBB actually meant something, I just wanted to tell the world that it does not. 

Jill's costume factory

I'm off to a late start this year as far as costume-making goes.  But today I knocked out two of them.   

If you know nothing else about our family, you should know that we love gingerbread.  Not sick gingerbread like most people make.  But really good gingerbread that I make.  We make gingerbread cookies all year long, and the kids have always loved to be read The Gingerbread Man story.  It's sort of an obsession at our house.  Plus, we like the part about "Run, run as fast as you can."  Because that's what we do.  We run.  As fast as we can.

We also love Mary Poppins. Maybe not ALL of my kids, but most of them love it.  I watched the movie at least 400 times as a kid, and my kids watch it a lot.   I have every word memorized, and I sing the songs quite frequently.  So naturally Savanna wanted to be Mary Poppins for Halloween.  This costume was more just gathering things we already had (the hat, the bag, the coat, the umbrella, the scarf).  I bought a yard of gray fabric to make an easy elastic-waist skirt, and we bought a spray of daisies to attach to the hat.

 Who wants to play Tidy Up The Nursery?