Who said Laundry Day isn't exciting?

I was in the laundry room this morning doing my usual Monday laundry thing. Only this time I decided to clean the laundry room while I was at it. It was pretty dusty, and things had just been shoved into the room and not put back on shelves where they belonged. I started to remove a pile of old backpacks that had fallen from the shelf when somebody wanted the one on the bottom of the stack a while ago. Underneath the stack was a mousetrap--with a very, very dead mouse squished in it.

I have no idea how long it had been there. I always keep a mousetrap loaded up in there, as we find a couple of mice every year in our house. It could have been weeks! I quickly picked up the trap and threw it away, and dumped some bleach on the floor. I ran the trash bag outside, and came back into the house.

Zachary followed me down the stairs. He is getting very big, and very smart. We had a stack of 3 boxes high blocking Zachary from the non-kid-friendly part of our basement. I went into the laundry room to finish up, and then Zack was right there with me. He can power this stack of boxes now. It's time to raise it to 4!

Anyway, I was organizing the shelves, and then I heard Zack say, "Mama, where Go?" I turned around and his hands were out at his sides with his palms up. I said, "Zack, where DID it go?" He walked over to the wall and pointed. Our laundry room has 2 washer/dryer hookups. We only have one set right now, so there is a square on the wall waiting to hook up an additional washer/dryer. Zack pointed to the black drain tube that a future washing machine will use. He had put that sleek, brand-new phone I had just put in the laundry room so I didn't have to run up the stairs like a maniac when the phone rang right down the drain pipe. Now when the phone rings I can hear it inside the wall--for now, until the battery dies. So now I've got to figure out some way I can snake something down there to grab the phone and pull it back up.

And that was all while the first load was in the washing machine. Who can tell what other fun we will have today--the stack at the bottom of the laundry chute was up to my head today.

A really good book

I was cleaning out the bookshelf this week and I found our tattered old copy of this book. It's called, "The Children's Book of the Body." We bought it for Abram when he was 3, and it is absolutely the best book about the body for kids. Trust me--we looked at dozens. I'm not sure if you can find it new anymore, but there are plenty of used copies on amazon.

This book teaches kids about what is inside of our bodies, and how their bodies work, and it leaves out any mention of ..... I'll just say parts and functions they don't need to know about when they are so little.

I was glad to find this book to start reading with Savanna and Zack.

This book taught Abram so much when he was little. It lead to these kinds of intelligent statements coming from his mouth: "Hey, I can see your uvula!" and "Mom! I'm bleeding! It's a good thing for clotting factors."

All of our kids have loved this book.

A random memory

I was remembering this past week one of the funny (and dang smart) things Abram said when he was about 3. If anyone doesn't know Abram, he has always soaked up any scientific knowledge that came his way. This inluded the DK Eyewitness books when he was tiny.

At the time this happened, Abram had been loving ocean life. We had read books about whales and sharks. We were visiting at my Mom's house, and I heard this conversation:

Abram: Hey, Uncle Jeff, do you want to play?

Jeff: Sure, Abram.

Abram: You be the whale, and I'll be the shark (handing Jeff a whale toy).

Jeff: You'd better watch out. I'm going to eat you! (Jeff's whale toy makes a lunge for Abram's shark toy).

Abram: Jeff, whales don't eat sharks. Whales eat phytoplankton!

Back to life.....back to reality

Spring Break is over. We had a very relaxing, mellow week. The kids did jobs, cleaned out their closets, hung around, watched movies, made movies, and had a blast. Spring Break usually brings terrible weather around here, but I have really enjoyed the cold and snowy week we've had. It has helped me get even MORE excited for the Carribean sun awaiting me next weekend!

Our one big excursion we made this week while the kids were out of school was to Costco on Friday. Where else can you feed 9 hungry people lunch for $20? Of course, we got the usual 12 gallons of milk, and 2 cart-loads of other food and household items. But Costco lunch is fine dining for our kids. They actually PICK to go there.

Tomorrow 6 AM is going to come early for all of us. The kids have been sleeping in to a leisurely 7:30 AM this past week!

A trip to IKEA

I took the kids the other day for our first trip to IKEA. It opened in Portland sometime last year--probably more than 6 months ago. We had never been, but it was a good day for an outing.

What a wonderland of cheap and useful items! The kids all had a blast, and we found some very practical things for their bedrooms. I have been looking for something to help the kids keep their school papers and library books somewhere besides the kitchen counter. The rule at our house is if you leave it on the counter, it will disappear and Mom is not responsible for anything that gets thrown away or recycled. Twice this year Joel has been looking for homework, and it was nowhere to be found.

IKEA had these great wall baskets. 3 per rack, $19.99 each. I let each kid write his or her name with fabric paint (I wish I had done this myself because they look a little crazy now, but I just tell myself that the personalization will help them feel some "ownership"), and hung them in the stairway to the basement. Each person can keep important papers or books in his or her box rather than on the counter or shoved in a kitchen drawer. So far so good. I think I'm going to go to Walmart and get some silver spray paint for the metal frame. The black is OK, but chromish- silver would be much better. What were those IKEA designers thinking?

Albino no more!

This morning I did something I had never done before. I have been a little anxious (for those of you non-word-nerds, anxious is not the same thing as eager!) about my albino skin in the tropical sun in Belize. It would be generous to say I have "fair skin." I worry about the Central American sun baking my skin, so I thought I would give my epidermis a little head start. After dropping the kids off at school this morning, I stopped at the local "Jamaican Me Tan" despite my loathing of its name. I picked this spot due to its proximity, and also because they sell tans by the minute, rather than forcing you into a long-term commitment.

After 5 glorious minutes on the tanning bed, I emerged to find my skin a lovely shade of pink. I'm not looking for a Hawaiian Tropic tan, but I'm also hoping to not be the poster child for Coppertone Water Babies SPF 50.

We'll see how it goes. I still purchased the Costco pack of Neutrogena SPF 50 lotion when I was there last week. I know my skin can only take so much!

...And you don't mess around with Jill

One of my favorite tunes from the 70s is from Jim Croce. "You don't tug on Superman's cape. You don't spit into the wind. You don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger, and you don't mess around with Jim." Just put my name in there for now.

Tonight I had a very crazy experience. I pulled up into our driveway after picking up Abram from wrestling practice, and I heard a sad noise. It was SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. My tire was leaking air, and I was watching it deflate. I came in the house and called Roadside Assistance. They told me someone from a certain local car service would be at my house in about 40 minutes. An hour later, a really scary guy was at the door. I went outside and unlocked my car so he could get the spare tire out. I noticed that he was wasted. He couldn't walk a straight line. He couldn't form a coherent word. And boy, did he stink!

I came in the house and called the police. I told the dispatcher what was going on, and she kept me on the line until he turned his car on to leave. The police had to wait until he was actually driving to do anything about him. When he left, she thanked me and hung up. About 20 minutes later I got a phone call from the owner of the car service company thanking me for my call. The guy was high, drunk, and driving with a suspended license! Oh, yeah. He got fired, too. They impounded his car, and he is spending the night (and a few more nights) in jail. Hee Hee. Anyway, the lady was very appreciative that I had the sense to turn him in.

Yes, it is scary because he knows where we live. But he doesn't KNOW that I turned him in. He just thinks it was a random traffic stop. I couldn't NOT turn him in, because who knows what he could have done while driving under the influence.

By the way, that's the second drunk driver I've sent to jail. The first one was about 12 years ago in Nebraska. She spent a year in jail, and had her license permanently revoked. DUI, hit and run, no insurance, suspended license. That was a good one, too.

Deep Thoughts....by Savanna Belle

This is an actual conversation I overheard yesterday between Savanna and Abram. Savanna is a very deep thinker, and her descriptions of things are always very vivid. But the philosophy behind this one just floored me.

Abram (getting in the car to go to school with a Snapple in his hand): OK. I'm ready.

Savanna: Wait! I want a Snapple, too. Abram will you please get one for me?

Abram (exiting the car and going back into the kitchen): Sure, Savanna Belle.

Abram (back in the car with 3 Snapple bottles): I brought 3. Which one do you want? Pink, purple or orange?

Savanna (with her eyebrows scrunched and finger on her chin): Well, I'll take the orange one.

Abram: But I thought you would choose purple!

Savanna: Well, I couldn't decide between pink and purple. They are BOTH my favorite colors. So I chooseded orange.

A very nice boy

I think all of our kids are amazing. But this story is about Abram. He has been wrestling for his middle school as the varsity 120-pound guy. This was hard for me to take at first. At Skyline High School in Salt Lake, wrestling was not a cool sport. It was much cooler to be in the concert choir or jazz band than it was to wrestle. But I finally understand what a great sport wrestling is, and why it is so big up here.

There is a 6th grade JV boy on the team who was born without full legs or arms. He has 2 very short legs (about 10 inches below his hips) with no feet, and one arm to the elbow, and then another arm that was sort of re-constructed to give him a few functional fingers. This kid can run faster than almost anyone. He is not afraid to get out on the mat and wrestle. His attitude about life is incredible. He knows he is a normal kid inside, so he doesn't let his body stop him. It is very cute to see him hop up onto the back of his dad's motorcyle after wrestling and take off.

Most of the kids at school ignore this kid. Nobody teases him or is mean, it's just that people are a little afraid of him. Abram noticed this at the first wrestling practice, and he took his kid under his wing. Abram helps him get his wrestling shoes on before meets and practice (he has to wear them backward so he can run). Abram tussles with him in warm ups, gives him high 5s, sits by him, and is a really good friend to this sweet boy. Abram just loves this kid and has said many times how he noticed the first time he met this boy that he was just a really cool kid inside.
I had noticed this over the season, as I know that Abram has a special place in his heart for kids with disabilities. But yesterday the wrestling coach pulled Abram over and told him that he has never seen someone as kind as Abram, and that he is so grateful that Abram has made it his priority to make sure that this other boy knows that one of the big, cool varsity boys is his true friend.Mark told Abram that is a better award than a trophy!

Bad Luck Charm

I know there is no such thing as "bad luck," and it is a good thing I do know that. Otherwise, I would be forced to believe that my life's unusual string of strange events would be a result of bad luck, the misalignment of the cosmos, or punishment for misdeeds in a past life.

For instance, when I order something online, there is a 75% chance I will have to return it. Not because it doesn't fit, or I don't like the color. Rather, it will be broken, have a hole in it or some other problem. This happened two days ago. I finally ordered a new mixer from amazon. The UPS guy brought it to the door and rang the bell. He usually does the drop and run. But this time he was actually standing there. The box had a 10" diameter hole punched in it, and I could see the mixer. He asked if it was OK, or if I wanted to refuse it. As this was a NEW mixer I had ordered to mine that had died prematurely, I didn't want to take a chance that whatever event led to the box's mutilation had also damaged the contents of that box. So I sent it back, and I'll get a new one next week. I know that my history of ordering cannot be normal, or internet commerce would cease to exist, not only from consumer frustration, but also from merchants going bankrupt returning 75% of everything sold.

If I have to make a guess between 2 things (true or false, left or right, yes or no), I will undoubtedly make the wrong selection.

Lately, I have noticed that I am bad luck to others around me. Not really, I know. But it is a bizarre string of coincidental events. Abram is a wrester. I try to make it to his matches, but I usually miss them by just a few minutes. The two matches that I actually made it to were times that the ref called him "pinned" although everyone in the gym could see that he was NOT pinned, or even close. Every other match he has had that I have not attended, he has not been pinned. So 2 weeks ago I made him a deal that I would NOT come to watch him. 3 pins in a row! After I picked him up after his last meet, I sang him a little song. You know the Elvis song "Good Luck Charm." I just changed the words a little:

Don't need to break a mirror,

or have a black cat cross my way.

Your luck is worse than anyone's on earth.

It's no wonder that I say,

Be my little bad luck charm,

woh-oh-oh you sweet delight.

I got a bad luck charm

Hanging on my arm

Glad she missed my meet tonight!

If I had a big tall ladder

I'd toss it across the bay.

Who needs a curse? I've got something worse.

So stay out of my way!

Abram thought it was funny. Seriously, I know it's just life that things happen. It just surprises me how frequently things happen to me.

Invisible muscles

Abram is scrawny. He's tall and thin. Sure, he's bulked up to the 120-pound weight bracket this year for wresltling, but he's still really skinny. And he is also a very good wrestler. Nobody can pin him. Sometimes he loses by points, usually only when he's getting choked, but usually he wins. He is one tough kid. The kids who are his opponents usually have arms 3 times the circumference of Abram's arms. But somehow Abram comes out ahead. He never gives up--that's his secret.

After Abram pinned a really, really, really big and strong kid on Tuesday, Abram's coach said to the team, "Look at Abram using his invisible muscles!" Abram has a big heart, and somehow that compensates for lack of muscle fibers.

Plus, he's super cute. And he loves his mom.